Autistic "Engineering" games pt.2: "Hardspace: Shipbreaker"

[Cosmic Sewer Hobo]

I was planning to cover the game “Satisfactory” this time but since that game is just a First-Person Factorio (to a certain extent) with Fortnite-like platform building, I decided to leave it for later and cover a different game that may or may not be considered to be an “Engineering game”. But since this is my thread, what I say goes. Therefore, this game is an “Engineering game” because fuck you, bitchassnigga.

Hardspace: Shipbreaker is a First-person (puzzle?) game where you play as a “Shipbreaker” who salvages shit from abandoned and decommissioned spaceships in a zero-gravity environment by chopping them to manageable pieces using a plasma cutter just like the one in dead space laser cutter and yoink them into chutes with a gravity gun from half life a grappler. In the game’s universe this is probably the most dangerous and deadliest profession ever.

The character you’re playing as has been regarded as a “professional with peak physical and mental capabilities for the job” but the poor bastard has been absolutely jewed so hard and amassed a small debt of A BILLION DOLLARS that you need to pay back with interest to the corporation (((LYNX))) all that while you’re paying for rent of your room and equipment

Imagine how would Isaac Clark from “Dead space” job’s would be like if there weren’t any xenomorphs around to be sliced like a slab of shawarma with repair tools, it will probably look like something like this game (hence HARDSPACE, geddit? HARDSPACE? DEADSPACE?)

This game is one of many “physical labour/job simulators” just like stuff like Euro Truck simulator and Farming simulator, imagine people coming home after hours and hours of wage-slaving only to wage-slave in a virtual world for virtual money (LOL!.....I mean….oh fuck off)

The controls are a pain in the sphincter but with enough practice you can manage (AS IF, LOL!), you fly forwards, backwards, left and right with your WASD and rotate counter clockwise and clockwise with Q and E

Holding Q and E together will be your brakes and you WILL ABSOLUTELY NEED THEM because in this game you don’t just fly in a certain direction, you actually ACCELERATE towards said direction meaning that you build momentum that will carry over and ragdoll you around like a poor kid being admin-abused with a gravity gun in Gmod for calling someone a “nigger” in a squeaky voice.

You can also grab unto shit with your hands using Z for your right hand and X for your left hand and glue yourself to them. Grabbing unto shit makes you weigh like whatever your grabbing and making it possible to reel in objects heavier than you (you as in the playable character not you IRL, you’re probably too fat to even need this feature). You can also alternate between Z and X to climb and drag yourself across surfaces spiderman style! Useful for dragging your dumbass away from processors and furnaces if they were sucking you in

"wagieman! wagieman! on his way to make his employers bank!"

The "ships" you encounter are just oversize lego toys that held together with few shoddy "links" or "cut point" which is what you're suppose to ISIS with your laz0rz, Imagine the ships being balloons made of uncuttable nanocarbon with another balloon made of aluminum inside it and these two “balloons” are held together by those cut points. you need to get inside the ship's airlock and depressurize it from inside before you start slaving working otherwise the bitch will pop and you will get assfucked. Speaking of getting assfucked...

There are so many ways you can get your stupidass killed in this game mainly because the ship you’re dismantling is still fucking running and fully operational. The dumbasses at Lynx didn’t even bother isolating the ship’s systems before handing you out the fucking work orders (probably because the isolation process costs money that your life isn’t worth). OSHA is going to have a FIELD DAY seeing the way the work is being conducted (assuming that Lynx aren’t already paying them off with jewgold for them to look the other way, hushhush-pass-it-under-the-table kind of a deal).

Here is a list of what I found so far:

-Getting sucked into the furnace or processor

-Getting vaporized because you cut a nearby fuel line

-Getting frozen because your cut/destroyed something with coolant in it

-Getting electrocuted because you cut/destroyed something electrical

-Getting crushed between panels

-Getting smacked in the face with fast-moving objects being moved with tethers

-Getting smacked in the face with objects/panel launched after your cut/rupture a pressurized compartment from an unpressurized one (or smacked in the ass after rupturing an unpressurized compartment from a pressurized one)

-Getting your visor smashed somehow and watching yourself die a slow and painful death as your health slowly depletes to zero (This only happened to me once and I’m not sure how, my guess is it’s something to with the smacking and crushing mentioned above)

You have two ways of using your cutter, the stinger mode where you pinpoint your laser at shit and heat the fucker up until it vaporizes and the splitsaw mode where you cut in a straight line from your crosshair be it horizontally or vertically, these are the two modes you can swap to on the fly for whatever cut you’re planning for. Nanocarbon and Titanium cannot be cut with your cutter but chunks of them can be separated from the ship by cutting the "cut points", however aluminum can be chopped up however you may please or use the "smart approach" to disassemble the panel to get as much salvageable metal as possible

Knowing the weights of the objects and panels is very important in this game, by pointing your crosshair at anything you will get the weight of such object in this format (just don’t point it at your mom otherwise you will fry the circuits and Lynx will charge you for it):

A

A= Total weight of the object combined with everything attached to it (or weight of the “assembly” you’re looking at)

B= weight of the part that you’re specifically pointing at

Initially, everything you point will give you the same value of “A” which is the total weight of the ship since everything in the ship is welded together (which won’t be the case for long, Mr. shipBREAKER), you need to go chop shit up such as cut points, joints, corners and pipes to separate parts of the ship so you can actually be able to move the “meat” around and salvage it.

But of course when you’re done chopping every possible link of a panel and attempt to move it around with your gravity gun grappler you will notice that the bitch is still very heavy (DAYUMN!), meaning that despite all the links being severed there is still something that is holding the fucking part to the overall fucking ship! So you scramble around like a complete spastic and wasting precious time only to realize why the panel is not budging because of a hidden cut point that you missed.

Or even worse, that the reason why 3 FUCKING PANELS EACH WEIGHING AROUND 500KG (that’s 1100 lb. for mutts and foot fetishists) ARE STILL ATTACHED TO THE FUCKING SHIP IS THE FUCKING COMPUTER IN THE FUCKING CORNER THAT SEEMS TO BE SCREWED IN THERE WITH A BILLION SCREW THEN WELDED SHUT, NIGGA IT’S JUST A COMPUTER NOT A GLUE-LIKE TUMOR, WHY IS IT ACTING LIKE ONE?!

(((Lynx))) being the cunts great employers that they are provided an alarm system in your suit that alerts you of important things in regards to your productivity safety to ensure that they generate as much profit from your sorry ass you operate in a safe environment away from any sources of work-related injuries, this is for money’s your sake after all. For example, if your suit is running low on oxygen, your suit will remind you to refill your oxygen from the master jack from which Lynx will charge you fucking money happily provide because asphyxiation may lead to missed salvage quotas death.

There are two things that are certain in this world, death and taxes debt, in this game it’s true for debt only because you are not allowed to die. If you got yourself killed, you will be resurrected with the “cloning process” and fucking charged for it by adding the fee to your debt. You’re not allowed to taste the sweet release of death without paying your debts, How fucking jewish is this?! if anything, this game is a social commentary on the bleakness of the modern life under jewish capitalism where the labourer are "estranged" and are deprived of everything that makes them human. It also comments on how the industrial revolution and it's consequences has who fucking cares, this thread just keeps dragging on and on and on, just like our everyday lives where no day is different than the other, it's the same tedious process of wake up work and play. nothing to be proud of and nothing worth remembering, a drag that we all wish to fucking end. This is the true wish of every modern man... OK END OF THE FUCKING THREAD, NOW AS PER USUAL, FUCK OFF!

 

[Viril.Feline.Wyyzrd]

That is a whole lotta info.